January 25th, 2010
Touching the Burner
When we’re young, we’re curious. We experiment a lot.
We don’t mind trying new things, whether it’s walking on our hands, running backwards, putting our hand in the toilet, or whatever. We do this even if the result is to get hurt, and that’s because our curiosity drives the understanding of how the world works. The more we try, the more we figure stuff out.
I call this process touching the burner– it’s the process of being curious, and trying new things, which we started as children.
When we get older, we don’t do this anymore. There are good reasons– first, our world is limited. Over time, we’ve mostly figured out how it goes, so we don’t need to. But the pain we feel through experimentation puts us on the defensive, and once we’re there, the reward of discovering something new isn’t worth the suffering we go through anymore.
But there’s a big problem here. Those that continue to experiment are rewarded with more experience. Those that think “I’m fine where I am” never do– their world stops growing, and they don’t truly understand why.
I want my world to keep growing. You probably do too.
Anaxagoras once said: “It is by having hands that man is the most intelligent of animals.” Our ability to handle stuff is part of what makes us masters of our environment. Our ability to manipulate stuff with our hands and our brains help us figure out what we can do with what we have. But we have to keep doing it for this to work.
Overcoming fear needs to be taught, or learned. The attitude we need to develop should be– “this may hurt, but I’m going to do it anyway.” We have to do this– we owe it to future selves.
In the talks I do, I discuss how touching the burner, what we all did as children, is what all children do instinctively. Humans are pattern machines, but this pattern needs to be returned to, because experimentation is what leads to success on both a personal and global scale. I suspect that, if you stop experimenting, where you are today is basically where you’ll be forever.
So this one attitude, touching the burner, is one that I encourage you to cultivate. Consider it very seriously; becoming that kid again could change everything for you.
Also of interest: How to think about self-help books
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January 23rd, 2010
When Context Takes Over
Magazine readers still have a hell of a time finding out about the stuff they see inside, don’t they?
First, they write it down. Then they get to a web connection (computer or iPhone if they’re lucky). Then they Google it– and that’s just to get started. The percentage that lose interest along the way is huge. I can’t imagine how frustrating this must be to the people featured inside.
Obviously, life just doesn’t include the metadata that the web does. If a friend brings over a bottle of wine for supper, we don’t know how it’s rated, or how much it cost. We know nothing.
I’ve spent so much time on the web now that I’m starting to feel this emptiness, almost a lack of context, in some places where metadata is absent. If I see something I find interesting, I’d like to catalogue it. If I’m interested in learning more about something I read, I’d like to read its Wikipedia article. Am I alone?
So much will change when this is possible. Our ability to grok complex subjects will increase, as will our capacity to detect bullshit or misinformation. Context gives rise to better and deeper communication (like the use of the word ‘grok,’ above).
We can see the rise of a lot of this just by the way we use Google Maps to direct us where we’re going. A lot of the conventions can go away if you have everything at your fingertips– we don’t need to ask for directions, for example. It goes without saying that we still need to doubt what the metadata is telling us, but if we have that solved, what then?
I think a willing suspension of context acquisition, like the suspension of disbelief when we see a movie, will arise. We’ll start using it more often to return our sense of wonder, to bring us back to the place from before we knew everything. And some context, such as private experience, cannot be absorbed into metadata.
Earlier this week I was at Morningside Estates, a bed and breakfast in the woods outside Victoria that’s absolutely gorgeous. I stayed for two days, didn’t login with foursquare, or upload many pictures. The experience was mine. It was more valuable because of that.
But here lies a dilemma. If I liked the experience, shouldn’t I want to share? Am I selfish for not, say, liveblogging it? Am I just reasonable? Where does the metadata begin, and where does the experience end?
Most importantly, how can I justify being private if I would like metadata to be available? Am I a hypocrite?
Also of interest: context free
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January 20th, 2010
Scars
A life that has been wasted leaves a body intact and pristine– but a life that has been properly used leaves scars.
Scars tell stories. They are what’s left by mistakes we’ve made. They’re what remind us of the places we’ve been and the people we’ve known.
Scars also tell us that we can handle what comes at us. When we look at a scar we got a long time ago, we remember the experience and see that we’re ok. Scars are the writing on the wall that says “You can endure.”
When I was young, my mother tried to teach me to cook, but I didn’t like the idea of getting my hands dirty, so I never learned. My hands stayed soft. There was nothing there to tell me what I’ve been through– because I hadn’t been through much.
Then I started playing capoeira and rock climbing a bit. My hands started to ache, leaving me with a kind of memory of what I had done. Over time, my hands became more resilient. I started to be able to handle pain and lost the fear of my hands being dirty.
Though it’s small, it’s a change that mirrors a larger one in my head. Now I’m not so afraid of being dirty; I’m not as afraid of making mistakes and being imperfect, particularly in front of other people. I’m better for the damage I’ve gotten.
Look– you’re going to get hurt. And sometimes, you’ll see it coming. But you should do it anyway. In fact, you need to. You need scars. You need stories.
You need to have lived.
Also of interest: Touching the Burner
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January 19th, 2010
The Hat You Wear
I saw this Fairmont doorman this morning in Calgary. Cute hat, right?
The hat is part of a uniform, of course, along with the coat and everything else he wears. He puts it on every day. But it’s also more than that. Every time this doorman puts on this uniform, he plays a role– one that includes his personality, but that isn’t quite him, either. The hat changes him.
We put on hats all the time. If you’re a boss, you put on that hat; if you work in customer service, you put on another. Every hat means something different, and it changes you in some way so that you can be more effective at what you’re trying to do. The doorman’s hat works because everyone else sees him differently. Think about it– how would you treat this guy if he wasn’t wearing it?
Hats in real life are actually kind of particular– more than anything other piece of clothing, they represent a station in life. Want an easy Hallowe’en costume? Put on a hat, and you’re a newsie, or a royal guard, or a spy. Nice.
I think we should use hats as a strategy. If we’re afraid, no sweat, we can put on the hat that makes us courageous. If we need to be creative, we can put on an artist’s hat, or a rebel hat. Even Tyler Durden was a kind of hat in Fight Club, now that I think about it.
Actually, I just remembered that there’s an entire book about this subject called Six Thinking Hats. It’s incredible. I read it about 10 years ago when I first started getting into Edward de Bono, a writer who has influenced my thinking a hell of a lot. You should pick up that book if you can find it.
Until then though, think about what kind of hat you could use in your life. If you need to, actually find one in real life that represents it to help you get into the role. It’s silly, I know, but the clothes make the man… so it really helps.
Also of interest: Rule Enforcers and Rule Makers
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January 18th, 2010
Opinions
Ever wonder where your opinions come from?
Jonathan Safran Foer, a pretty famous author, just published Eating Animals, a whole book about his becoming vegetarian in a time where nobody wants to hear about it at all (even me). Can you imagine trying to change someone’s mind like this?
Opinions are often smart, but what’s interesting to me is when opinions are where we just stopped thinking. We were heading in a direction, our thoughts were getting more complex about a subject. Then we got kind of lazy. An opinion was formed, which hasn’t changed since.
Some of our opinions need to be changed radically, but challenges make us defensive, which in turn makes us close up and avoid opposing viewpoints altogether. Those whole opinions are challenged need to have it happen subversively, or not at all. This is why change often has to come from the inside a circle of trust.
But getting inside the circle changes us. Lawyers who “try to change the system from the inside” (cue movie trailer music) often become changed themselves. They’ve invested so much into it that they can’t help but have their opinion be transformed by their experiences. To whom do they owe their allegiances– their past self, or their current one?
As we get more successful in this space, we’ll get closer and closer to traditional business. We should be careful we don’t entirely lose our ability to be radical. Since it’s what makes us interesting and valuable to old world, it may be one differentiator we should really be holding onto.
Also of interest: an old banner
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January 16th, 2010
Wow, look over here! Awesome! Bright! Shiny!
Have you been reading this blog via RSS? It may be time to take another look.
Today, the team at Stresslimitdesign and I are making public the final redesign of this blog, which has otherwise been half-assedly designed by myself since 2004. Only now, however, can I say I’m really happy of the way it looks and behaves.
Justin, Colin, and everyone else over there did a ridiculous amount of work on this beast. They built an entire set as backdrop (the two red LED signs in the design actually exist, as do all the other objects you see). The archive section is built from scratch and looks frikkin gorgeous. Everything has been thought through and there are a million little details that become noticeable over time. Check out the blog and the new landing page at JulienSmith.com.
One of the goals we had was to change the fact that every person in social media kind of has the same site– Thesis template, “add me on Twitter” badge, etc. etc. We wanted to do something different, that doesn’t only focus on converting, and that differentiates me (and weirds people out slightly) the way I feel that I would myself in person. Heh.
Anyway, if you haven’t been here in a while, I recommend you look around a bit, and let me know what you think.
Thanks for continuing to follow me through all the incoherent ramblings. :)
Also of interest: Attention is Power
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January 14th, 2010
You Will Not Always Matter
Imagine that the coffee shop you visited today knew that you would leave a Yelp review.
What would happen? Maybe they’d treat you well, an extra dose of courtesy or maybe a little more food. They might offer you a brownie for free at the end of the day or something, since they’re getting rid of them later anyways. Any number of small details could make a difference– and tip your 3-star review into a 4-star one. Little things make a big difference.
Maybe this is what Google means when they say “Everything is better when it knows who I am.” If you’re a prolific sharer, you get a better deal, or they know how you like your espresso, so your experience is just a little better than usual. They know your preferences. This is the direction foursquare is going– they know when I share, so they know that I’m valuable.
But there’s another side to this too. Right now, my mobile phone company knows how much I spend, so it knows how to treat me. If I’m only spending $30/month, it knows I’m of little value– in other words, everytime I call, I’m telling them “Ignoring me will cause you little to no dip in profitability.”
They know this because they know me. Is this what Google means, too?
What if everyone knew that I would make very little difference to their bottom line? If I choose not to share, or don’t know how to, I become less significant. There is a real cost to opting out of the system, and that cost becomes greater as everyone else gets more known, especially through the kind of passive sharing Google takes part in. This will get more intense as they get more of your data– GPS info through the Nexus One, never mind what we’re curious about on an everyday basis, etc.
Every piece of information a company gains about us is also a way to segment us– valuable vs. not-valuable. That’s why invisible means impotent. And by definition, most people will be non-valuable, just like people with less influence can’t get into cool parties.
“Do you know who I am???”
“Actually no, I don’t.”
Exactly.
How do you feel about this? I mean, it’s kind of inevitable, so does it even matter how we feel? Should we just accept that in some places, what we think doesn’t matter?
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January 13th, 2010
Why You Need Something Ugly
When I first saw Wil Murray’s art, I was pretty sure it was ugly.
My friend Justin Evans, the co-founder of Stresslimitdesign, had one of his pieces on his wall. I had gone over to his house, looked at the painting and thought, “I don’t think I’m smart enough for this.” Either that, or it was really ugly.
I was pretty sure it wasn’t ugly, though– both Justin and my girlfriend at the time thought it was great. It must have been me– right?
Anyway, a year later I was at a gallery in Montreal looking at his new work, and it wasn’t ugly; it was actually kind of cool.
Here’s my theory: I think you need something ugly in your life. And I don’t just mean ugly– I mean really repulsive. Something that you can’t help but be confused by, that freaks you out, or that’s just plain terrible to look at. In other words, something that challenges you.
Ugly things don’t just make you think; they also unbalance you, and connect with you emotionally over time. All of this makes you different, developing your sense of taste and what you think of as acceptable. And your being challenged is necessary to keep you growing.
Your ugly thing doesn’t need to be an object– it can also be a person. You can get someone in your life that grates on you, that makes you feel uncomfortable and challenges the things you say– someone that doesn’t believe the hype.
So here’s what I ask myself: What happened, why did I kind of like what I saw at the gallery that night? Did I change, or did the work? Probably both, right? But what happened isn’t what matters to me– only that it did happen, that I got a more nuanced understanding of the world as a result of it. I like that it happened, and I want– no, I need– more of it.
Very likely, so do you.
Also of interest: Rule Enforcers and Rule Makers
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January 12th, 2010
Btw, I do a podcast
Every two weeks or so, Mitch Joel, myself, and a few other smart guys get together and do a show called Media Hacks.
In case you haven’t checked it out, we talk about all sorts of awesome internet stuff. Episode #23 just came out, so you should check it out and report back. There will be a test.
Also of interest: Podcast 1
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January 12th, 2010
Do What Others Will Not
The only way to get ahead is to do what others will not.
If you’re in a job and you’re wondering why it takes so long to get a promotion, wonder no longer. Everyone has a job. Everyone is working 9 to 5. Everyone follows the rules. Never mind if you’re in a huge company– then there really are a million people who all act the same, and tell you what is ok and what isn’t. And you believe them and follow their lead, so of course no one gets anywhere.
Work in a small company, and it’s easier. Work in no company whatsoever, and it’s easier still.
Do what others are not willing to do. Go further than them. Take crazier risks than they are willing to take.
This quote, by the Spanish poet Antonio Machado, punched me in the face when I heard it:
“Traveler, there is no path. Paths are made by walking.”
Also of interest: No related posts
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